


I don't care where we go, just keep me close

by Eversincefiveboys



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 14-year-old-Harry, 16-year-old-louis, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Summer Camp, M/M, No Smut, Sick Harry, Summer Camp, and yeah, at some point, but they are the high school ages, i dont know what tags to use, its not in high school, please just read it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-27 13:40:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2695061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eversincefiveboys/pseuds/Eversincefiveboys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis has to go on summer camp and he absolutely doesn't want to because he is 16 and too old for this. Then he meets the boy with the curls and the dimples and suddenly he doesn't want this camp to be over</p>
            </blockquote>





	I don't care where we go, just keep me close

**Author's Note:**

> I worked very long on this and it'd mean a lot to me if someone read it.  
> Oh I didn't know the correct word for camp leader I hope "animator" is okay but I don't think so, if anyone has a solution please let me know.  
> All mistakes are mine.  
> The title is from Lewis Watson - Close

Louis sighs as he zips up his bag. He wishes it took longer to pack, because he really doesn't feel like leaving. He wants to stay here, in his room, he doesn't want to go to some stupid summer camp, not again.

"Lou! Are you finally ready?" His sister shouts from downstairs.

"Yeah, coming!" Louis yells back and sighs again. He picks up the bag and swings it over his shoulder. One more look around his room which he is going to miss for three weeks and then there is nothing to hold him here anymore. He has to go. He closes the door and plasters a fake smile on his face, before he descends the stairs.

"Finally!" Lottie says as soon as she sees her brother appearing. "What took you so long?"

Louis ignores her and puts on his coat because, of course, it's raining on the day they are leaving for a _summer_ camp. It's probably a sign, a sign to show him that this is going to be even worst three weeks of his life.

Sure, he liked going to the camp in the beginning. But that was when he was ten years old, around Lottie's age.

The summer camp was for children from ten to sixteen, different activities for different age groups. It wasn't like Louis never enjoyed it, but he had had enough of it. It is the same every year, same activities, same events. Many same people.

He has always loved going, but he is sixteen now, he isn't  a kid anymore. He doesn't need some summer camp to be able to enjoy his holidays. He is probably going to be the oldest there and feel stupid and awkward. He probably won't make any friends this year because no-one of his old friends is going anymore. He can't blame them, if he had the same dignity he would do the same. The problem is that he's not that easy in saying no to his mum. It's not easy for him to not do what she wants. He knows he's sixteen and should be able to go against his parents. He does that, of course. But when it's about things like this, he can't.

Jay wants Louis to go so he can keep an eye out for Lottie, that's the only reason. It's Lottie's first year and Jay is scared to let her go alone, so she signed Louis up too. Louis had been angry at first, he had yelled that he was too old for that and that he wasn't some babysitter. With stamping feet he had ran up the stairs and locked himself in his room. He knew that Jay wasn't going to change her mind, though, because she was convinced that Louis would have fun anyway. So, eventually, he had stopped protesting and just accepted it.

Now he was standing in the hallway, cursing at himself for giving in so easily. Really, congratulations. If he wanted to proof that he was sixteen and grown up, he should not listen to everything his mum says.

"Let's go," Jay says as she picks up Lottie's bag and opens the front door. Louis walks out of the door and to the car without saying anything. Lottie follows him, babbling excitedly as if she hasn't noticed Louis' pissed off face.

"I'm so excited, Lou. Marie went last year and she promised me it's so much fun and I really can't wait! Apparently you can have one croissant for breakfast every day! Isn't that amazing? Why haven't you told me anyway? Oh, and I really hope there are going to be nice girls because I really want to make friends. Do you think I'll share a room with nice people? I hope so. I'm so excited!"

"Said that already," Louis mumbles from the front seat but Lottie doesn't hear him, she goes on and on about how excited she is and this is one of those moments where Louis wishes he didn't have any sisters. As much as Louis loves them, sometimes he can't stand them. Sibling love, he guesses.

Jay takes her seat at the driver's side and smiles at Lottie. Then she turns to Louis and nudges him softly.

"Come on, Boo. It's only one more time and you've never hated it. It's going to be fun, okay? Just be happy, for your sister. And for yourself, because you'd better look at this from the positive side, or you'll just be so grumpy the whole summer and you're the only one who'll have to deal with the consequences," Jay says and Louis sighs again. Sometimes he really hates how wise parents can be and how they can make you feel incredibly stupid. But he's not going to give in, not again.

"We'll see about that," he says. "It's my life and I chose what to do with it."

"I know you'll have a great time anyway, no matter how much you pretend to hate it now," Jay insists, as if Louis hasn't just made a statement. "See it as a closure of your childhood."

"Did that last year," Louis says and turns to look out of the window and ignores his mother for the rest of the ride. She seems to get that, because the rest of the drive passes in silence between the two. There is a loud talking from Lottie in the backseat, though, so it's not completely silent. Louis knows that he should be a good big brother and be happy for her and play along and at least pretend to be as excited as her, but he can't bring it up to do that. Not now. He had wanted to spend his summer with his friends, going from party to party and living life to the fullest. But instead of that he got a summer camp. A stupid _summer camp_.

The drive takes them to the same place Louis has gone for six years now and when he sees the buildings surrounded by the field and forest, he can't deny the nostalgic feeling in his stomach. Memories flood into his mind and remind him of all the good times he's had here. He remembers how he arrived here for the first time, less excited than Lottie and actually a bit terrified of having to leave his home for so long. But then he met nice guys with whom he became the besets of friends and soon the three weeks had passed and he didn't want to leave. He smiles at the memory, seeing how the next year, the boys and him were still best friends even though they hadn't talked for a whole year. By this time they were eleven, so they exchanged addresses and phone numbers so they could keep in contact. This went on for years, until two years ago when they were old enough to go to parties and they met up there, still being the friends they'd always been. They kept in contact, but not much. It was enough, though. It was a special friendship, one where you didn't need to talk all the time, where you could have a yearlong break, and you were still best friends as soon as you started talking again.

Last year, the boys and him had had a nice last time at the summer camp, doing all the things they had always wanted to do. Sneaking out of bed in the middle of the night and spending the night in the forest, convincing all the ten-year-olds that if you opened the third door to the right in the corridor on the second floor you'd never come back. They scared the youngest for a good few days because all the older people played along.

They had had an amazing last year here, doing all the stuff they had always wanted to do. In the end there had been a party and they had all seen it as their last.

But now Louis is back again and it doesn't feel right to him. He feels embarrassed, lonely and awkward while Lottie is looking wide-eyed at the buildings.

They say goodbye to their mum, Lottie first, hugging her tightly and promising to call with Louis' mobile once a week, and then it's Louis turn.

His mum hugs him too, but Louis doesn't really hug back. It's not like he's going to miss her after what she's done to him.

"Make the best of it, yeah? You'll see that time'll fly and everything will be over before you know it. You'll have just as much fun as the past years and you'll find some new friends. I'm sorry to force you into this, Boo, but I don't want your sister to be here alone and I know you don't really hate it," she says as she strokes Louis' hair softly.

Louis just nods, he doesn't want to show her that he understand and that maybe she's right and it won't be as awful as he thinks.

"Be good, yeah?" Jay says and kisses Louis' cheek. "I love you."

"Love you too," Louis replies automatically, because he always replies that when his mum says it. It's a natural thing between them, they always say I love you's because it's something very important to the two of them. They know it, but they say it often too, just to reassure. And Louis can't ignore that, he can't pretend to not hear it or not say it back because he imagines it hurts quite a bit if your own son doesn't answer your I love you's. So, out of respect and politeness, Louis says "I love you too." and then turns to Lottie to go inside the building.

 

Inside, they need to say their names to people who check if they're on the list and then give them their room number.

"Louis Tomlinson!" The man behind the table with the papers exclaims as he sees Louis and Lottie enter the building. "I must say, I was surprised to see your name on the list again, I thought you had decided that last year was your last." Louis recognises the man as James, the head leader –animator - of the camp.

"Yeah, me too," Louis sighs and tries to smile. "Gotta accompany my little sis."

"Oh," Jake says knowingly and smiles. "Make the best of it, okay? You've always liked it here, I don't see why this year would be different."

Louis nods. "Yeah."

"So who's your sister?"

"This is Lottie," Louis says as he pushes her forward a bit. She looks hesitant and shy, smiling up a little at Jake. "Lottie, meet Jake. The most awesome animator ever." He smiles at all the memories that flood into his mind again, James really was a great leader. He always came up with amazing ideas and he always knew what to do. He was probably the reason why Louis had liked the camp so much in the first place, without James there wouldn't have been a summer camp. James was only eighteen when Louis was ten, so by the time Louis was thirteen he had a massive summer-crush on the guy and when he was fourteen Louis convinced himself he'd gotten over it, but that summer had been even worse than the summer before. After that, the crush had worn off because Louis had found someone in school he was head-over-heels with - the boy didn't like him back but it was enough to get over his crush for James. Last summer, when Louis was fifteen, he wasn't crushing on the camp leader anymore, but he did have this soft spot for him. He still laughed the hardest at his jokes, still smiled the widest when James smiled at him and still listen the most to James' explanations. It wasn't a real crush, but it was this weird thing Louis could never get over. He had really hoped he wouldn't feel any of that this year, but now he is standing in front of James and he can't help the grin forming on his lips.

"Hi sir, I'm Lottie," Lottie says politely and extends her hand. James smiles at the gesture and shakes her hand.

"I'm James. And you don't have to call me sir, please just call me James."

"Alright," Lottie smiles and then James tells them their room numbers.

Louis first walks Lottie to her room because he knows this building by heart.

"Here you go. Be nice, okay?" Louis says and opens Lottie's door for her. There are already two girls inside who come up to her immediately. They greet her as if she is an old friend and Louis can see the joy in Lottie's eyes while she tells them her name and introduces Louis.

"Right, nice to meet you girls," Louis says and waves at them quickly. Then he turns to Lottie. "I'm going to my room now, okay?"

She nods and gives him a quick hug before Louis leaves to find room 219, which is one floor up because that's the boy's floor. He knows people are usually placed per age in their rooms, but he doubts if there's anyone his age around.

When he opens his room, he finds it empty. No-one there yet. He sighs for the millionth time that day and chooses on of the upper-bunks.

He's halfway through making his bed when there's a knock on the open door. Louis looks up to find James standing in the door way.

"Hi," James begins and Louis smiles at him automatically.

"Hi," he replies and tries to ignore the not-crush-but-still-weird feeling.

"I'm here to ask you for a favour," James says, his face serious - something Louis hasn't seen very often before. Except for that time when James was cross with Louis and his mates when they'd stayed up all night playing cards and around two am they had gotten hungry and Louis and Drake went to steal some food in the kitchen. James had caught them and had become angry and had put them on dishwashing-duty for the rest of the camp. Now it is another sort of seriousness, though. Not anger.

"Sure," Louis nods.

"We just got a call that one of the animators can't make it. Not for the rest of the camp, actually. Her sister lives in America and has fallen very ill, she and her family need to be there and organise a lot of stuff, so she just can't make it. I really need someone to take over her place, and since you are the oldest here and have done this camp five times before, I was wondering if you could consider taking her place and become animator. Of course you'd get your paid fee back and you'll get a salary at the end of the three weeks."

Louis doesn't have to think for even a moment. It's one of the easiest decisions he's ever made. He doesn't want to be stuck as the oldest, the awkward one who doesn't quite fit in anymore. He'd love to do something else, while he'll still be able to do what he has actually come for- looking out for his sister. He doubts she'll actually need him to watch out for her, but his mum insisted on it so Louis decides he'll just do what she's told him.

"Oh yes, please. I'd love to!" He says and James smiles at him and Louis feels his own grin extend.

"Thank you so much, Louis. You're my hero." He pulls Louis into a short embrace.

Louis has to change room because he's got to be in the leading-team now, the room at the beginning of the corridor. A room shared with all the other male animators.

When they have packed Louis' stuff and are standing in front of the room Louis used to fear when he was ten years old, he realises that maybe this is going to be fun after all, maybe his last summer camp will bring more surprises to him than he could've expected.

James open the door and points to a bed Louis can take while the other leaders introduce themselves - even though most of them Louis already knows.

James smiles at him and hands him a T-shirt with the name of the camp on before he says  "Welcome to the team" and Louis feels like maybe this is not going to suck after all.

*-*-*-*

 

"Okay, divide yourself into two teams, but don't take too long," Louis says while he finishes tying his shoe laces. He feels a bit uncertain, because it's the first time he has to lead a game and not play it, like the years before. James had come up to him, saying Louis needed to think of a game or something for the next day. Louis had decided on starting with something safe and easy, not much could go wrong.

So now he is standing here, in his football shorts and a loose T-shirt, ready to coach a game of football. He knows that they play at least one match every year on the camp, so he decided to start with that. The kids divide in two teams quicker than Louis has imagined - he always used to take a long time picking teams.

"Okay, there's not much to explain. I think everyone knows the rules. No fighting or swearing, no kicking or hitting or any other form of physical contact. Good luck and play fair," he says as he hands out red and blue vests the kids can put over their T-shirts to indicate in which team they are.

He throws the ball towards one of the older kids he remembers as Tom - the guy had been here for a few years now - and the two teams start playing. It's weird to watch from a distance and not be part of a team, but it feels good. It feels good to do something else and he is way happier with standing on the side than being an awkward too-old boy playing in a team where he doesn't belong. There are no people his age at the camp this year, everyone is fifteen or under. He can easily make friends with the fifteen-year-olds, he knows that. But he doesn't want to because he feels too old and awkward. Besides, all the people older than eleven have been here before and have found their own friends, so he'd just be an intruder anyway.

As he looks around and studies what the players are doing, his eyes fall on a boy not really playing along. The boy is standing on the opposite side of where he's supposed to score, hands in his pockets and eyes at his feet. A mop of dark brow curls falls over the boy's forehead, shadowing the rest of his face.

Louis checks that he won't be run over by some player running after the ball, and when he sees the coast is clear he crosses the field towards the boy.

"Hey," he says, "Why aren't you playing? This is an everyone's-needed game." His voice sounds happy and cheerful, but he is worried that maybe this kid doesn't like the camp at all. Or maybe he doesn't like football, or maybe he's being bullied and Louis doesn't notice. Louis doesn't know why, but he's worried about this boy.

"I think that if I'll play I'll just ruin it," the boy says laughingly, looking up from under his curls. Two shining green eyes meet Louis’ blue ones. The boy doesn't sound sad or left out, he sounds genuinely convinced but not like he cares. "I don't want them to have to be looking out for me, you know? I just want them to have fun at the game."

"Was this your decision or theirs?" Louis asks, not wanting anyone in his group to be bullied or be left out.

"Mine," the boy chuckles. "Please don't worry, sir. I really don't mind."

"Louis, not sir," Louis laughs, he's only, what, two years older than the boy? "Please, I'm only sixteen."

"Okay, Louis," the boy says and laughs again. The laugh makes Louis feel a little bit lighter.

"Well, if you really don't want to play, you can sit with me on the side, if you want to. I mean, of course you can keep standing here, if that's what you want," Louis grins and the boy nods.

"I'll sit at the side, thanks," he says and Louis and him walk back to where Louis was standing before. They sit down in the grass and watch the game for a while, not saying anything.

"What's your name by the way?" Louis asks after a while and glances at his side, only to be met by the bright green eyes of the curly-haired boy.

"Harry," the boy says and smiles. Dimples, Louis notices and he feels himself melt inside. Dimples. He loves dimples. He's always wanted dimples. He is jealous of everyone who has dimples and he's always had a soft spot for them. He tries not to focus on them and does his best to resist the urge of poking at them.

"So, is this your first time at the camp then, Harry?" Louis asks to distract himself but also because he really is interested. "I haven't seen you here before."

"Yep," Harry nods, his curls bouncing lightly on his forehead. "We moved to the neighbourhood only two weeks ago, and because we were so busy moving we couldn't go on holiday. Mum didn't want us to just sit around for three weeks, so she insisted I'd try this out while my sister is staying at a few friends." Harry talks quite slowly and in every sentence he uses his hands to explain. Louis doesn't know why but he likes this, he likes how Harry wants to make everything clear for maybe himself or maybe his listeners.

"Do you like it here, so far?" Louis asks, quickly checking if everything on the field is still going the way it's supposed to.

"Yeah, my roommates are nice and the animators are terrific," Harry says the last part with a somewhat exaggerated admiring tone. Louis laughs. He likes this boy.

"That's good. I'm sorry about picking football to play today, I didn't know there were people who didn't want to play," Louis apologises but Harry just smiles at him.

"It's fine, seriously. I'm just very rubbish, that's all. I don't mind sitting here, I promise," Harry says. He laughs again at Louis and Louis doesn't know what it is, but the boy does something to him. The boy makes him want to lie his head on his shoulder and play with his curls, the boy makes him want to poke his dimples and hold his hands. Louis has never felt this sort of affection before, especially not so suddenly and after just speaking with someone.

"Okay, but do tell me when you're bored. I'll make sure you get something else to do," Louis goes on. He wants to make sure Harry feels good here, under his guidance.

"I will," Harry smiles and then focuses on his new made friends on the field. It is silent between the two boys for a while, but the silence is okay. It's a comfortable silence, not an awkward one. They're both in their own little world and they both don't mind the company of the other. It's almost as if it's natural, as if this happens every day. By now Louis is sure he's becoming deluded and that he should really, really stop having weird crushes on people because this is just becoming creepy. He doesn't even know Harry, for God's sake. He doesn't know anything about the boy.

"Are you really only sixteen?" Harry asks out of nowhere and Louis jumps a little at the sudden sound.

"Yeah," he nods, not knowing where Harry is going.

"I didn't mean it rude, or something. I was just wondering because I thought you had to be eighteen or over," Harry tells him, his voice giving away that Harry felt like he had insulted Louis.

"Don't worry, Harry. I don't mind you asking," Louis assures him and then explains how he'd been forced by his mum to go to the camp one last time, to supervise his sister, and then how James had asked him to replace one of the animators. Harry listens closely and nods when the story is over.

"That clarifies it," he smiles. "Sucks that your mum forced you to go, though."

"Yeah, well. She was right. I don't mind it as much as I thought I would," Louis admits and Harry chuckles.

"How old are you by the way?" Louis then wonders aloud.

"Fourteen." Louis smiles in response because his mum had been right again, he'd make new friends quickly enough, even if they were younger.

They keep on talking for a while, Harry telling how his old school was and how small but cosy their old house was. He explains that he didn't mind the moving, but that it is quite hard nevertheless. Harry's mum has gotten a new job offer and for that they had to move. Harry explains that it is weird to get used to the new house and the new town, he says that it is quite strange to not be able to just go around to some friends to hang out, but he knows everything will be okay once he's settled in.

Louis listens to the younger boy speak, forgetting a bit about the players on the field. It's amazing how Harry just starts telling his story even though he doesn't really know Louis.

"Do you always just tell your whole life story?" Louis asks with a grin when Harry stops speaking. Harry laughs and shrugs.

"Nah, I think I just like talking to you," Harry smiles easily and Louis feels himself smile back. Things with Harry are easy, there is no awkwardness between the two boys. It's the first first-conversation Louis has had which doesn't have any slight awkwardness in it and it feels great.

They talk and talk until Louis' timer goes off an he notices that the teams have been playing for forty-five minutes  now so he calls out that they can take a break. While Louis reaches behind him to the cardboard box he had taken with him earlier, the boys and girls gather around Harry in the grass tiredly. Louis hands out drinks and a bar to everyone.

"Nice game, guys. D'you want to continue it or have you had enough?" He asks as he opens his own bottle of water.

Most of the boys and girls want to continue the match, so Louis decides that after fifteen minutes of break the game can continue.

He talks to the kids in those fifteen minutes, finding out that everyone in his group today is around fourteen. He thought it would be hard to communicate with the kids who signed up for the camp because he wasn't too sure how it worked with being the leader of the group and all that, but now he finds himself chatting away with the kids easily. They seem to like him and he enjoys all of this leading-the-camp stuff more than he thought he would.

"Why aren't you playing, by the way?" A girl with light brown hair tied in a ponytail asks after a while, looking at Harry.

"Oh, I'm really not good at it and it'd only ruin your game," Harry laughs and some kids laugh too.

"That can't be true! Come on, try at least!" The girl says and Harry turns to look at Louis. Louis doesn't know why Harry looks at him with questioning eyes, he doesn't know why Harry acts like he trusts Louis completely while they don't even know each other for longer than an hour.

Louis nods his head however, encouraging Harry to go play football with the other kids. A small smile appears on Harry's face and Louis doesn't understand, he doesn't understand why it seems like Harry wants agreement from him, but he likes it nonetheless.

"Maybe you should play, too?" Harry suggests, sounding a bit shy when he asks. "I mean, it sounds a lot more fun than watching us play." All the other kids yell in agreement, most of them already jumping to their feet and running back to their positions on the field. Louis debates a bit with himself, but after a few seconds he decides that yes, he should join the kids on the field. Harry stands up and extends his hand to pull Louis up, and even though it makes Louis chuckle a bit because Harry is younger than him and he should be the one dragging Harry to the field, Louis takes the hand gratefully and lets himself being pulled to his feet.

"Thanks," he mumbles softly and Harry grins at him, releasing their hands. Only then Louis realises that he didn't mind the touch at all and maybe he even liked it a bit, because maybe he'd liked it if he had been able to hold on to that hand for longer than a few seconds.

They both choose a position in the same team and then the game starts. Louis loves playing football. One of his outrages dreams is to become a professional football player. And even though he knows it's a bit out of reach and he'll probably never be good enough for it and he should've gone to a special school to train for it years ago, there's still this tiny little spark of hope in him he gets whenever he thinks about it. The spark grows when he is playing football, though. It's as if something in him wakes up, the desire to play football seriously and it grows. It grows and grows and gives him this nostalgic feeling because he used to be really obsessed with football when he was younger. He used to play it at school with his friends and then after school a lot. It was his thing, his hobby, his passion and he used to do it all the time. But then secondary school came and it's not like he lost interest, he just didn't play it as much anymore. And now whenever he plays he gets this nostalgic feeling which makes him happy and sad at the same time. Longing for the past where his world used to rotate around football but also giving him hope and dreams for the future.

As Louis is playing the game, he loses track of time and forgets about everything except the game. He focusses on the ball and on the players around him, tuning out all the unnecessary thoughts at that moment. He scores one goal and makes a fantastic pass which leads to a next goal so his team is now ahead in the game.

"Why didn't you say you were this good?" A voice says next to him when the ball is on the other side of the field and Louis is trying to catch up with it. He turns his head because he can't place the voice immediately. It's one of the rare times that he's brought out of his focus on the game and snapped back to reality. Harry. He needs a moment to make sure he doesn't stop breathing because wow, Harry really looks _good_ , running on the field like that. Louis hadn't been paying much attention to the boy because he was focussed on the game, but now he notices that all Harry has been doing is running up and down the field, not really attempting to get a hold of the ball. He looks really good running like that though, quite clumsy but that makes it cute. Harry reminds him a bit of a kitten, Louis thinks and can't help but smile at Harry.

"I'm not _that_ good," Louis says because he hates accepting compliments. He doesn't feel like he really deserves them and he it doesn't feel fair if he just says "thanks". And anyway, he's not _that_ good at football, he's simply had a lot of practice.

"No, seriously, you are," Harry says and if Louis is honest, he looks quite amazed. "You could be a professional."

Louis tries really hard not to blush because except for his mum nobody has ever said that to him. Nobody ever believed that Louis could reach his dream. Maybe Harry doesn't exactly say it, maybe it is more in the way his voice sounds matching the way his eyes shine. Maybe it's just the fact that Harry doesn't even know Louis well, but he's already making him feel like maybe Louis isn't too crazy.

"It was my dream to play professionally for a long time," Louis confesses, scratching his neck awkwardly. He doesn't really like confessing these things to people because he feels so stupid for ever even thinking it was possible.

"What stopped you?" Harry asks and Louis has to blink a few times to realise that Harry is serious.

"I realised I'd never be good enough, you know. You really have to be amazing to be a good footballer and I guess I've just had enough practise but I'm not outstanding or anything," Louis explains. He realises him and Harry have stopped running as soon as Louis started talking and now they're both just standing there, completely forgotten about the game and having a conversation in the middle of the field.

"You should've gone for it, you should've taken your chance! I mean maybe you still can, but if you'd tried to get into a school a few years ago you would've definitely become a professional," Harry says and it makes Louis' heart swell. This boy really believes in him.

"Says the one who doesn't know a thing about football," Louis laughs it off, because honestly, he has no idea how else he's supposed to react.

"Yeah true that," Harry laughs back. "But I'm serious, I know you could've done it. Maybe you still can."

"Dream's long gone," Louis shrugs, ignoring the spark in his chest which ignites at the idea of becoming a professional football player. It's always been his response, that it used to be his dream but isn't anymore. He doesn't tell people he hasn't stopped dreaming because he knows he's stupid, he knows he won't ever reach his dream. He knows, and that's why he pretends he's accepted that.

"Oh, well, I'm sure you could still-" Harry starts but he's interrupted by the football flying so close to his head that Louis has to pull him to the side.

"Wow, thanks," Harry breaths, staring at the ball which now lands on the grass and rolls further away.

Louis' hand is still on Harry's arm from where he touched him to pull him away, and he doesn't really want to take his hand away.

"Are you two still playing?" The girl with the ponytail asks as the other players approach Louis and Harry. Louis feels a blush creeping up his cheeks again and he thinks that he really has to do something about that because he is the leader of those kids and he's not supposed to be vulnerable in front of them.

"Sure," he says, flashing the kids a smile. He then realises he still has his hand on Harry's arm and he pulls it away quickly. "Let's win this game!"

He jogs towards the ball, followed by the other kids and he tries really hard to get into that same focus as always, but it doesn't work this time. Harry is always wandering on the back of his mind, no matter how hard he tries to ignore it. No matter how hard he tries to focus on the game and forget about all other things, the boy with the curls and the green eyes and the cute smile who tells him he can reach his dreams if only he tries and who gives him this warm feeling in his stomach keeps wandering on the back of his mind.

*_*_*_*

 

Louis likes this whole camp better than he thought. He hates to admit it, but his mum was right. Once again. He doesn't even have to look out that much for Lottie. She's doing fine, she already made friends and she seems to have the time of her life. So actually Louis should be really pissed off at his mum and he should be even more miserable than he was when he came here, but he isn't. He isn't because he likes what he's doing now, he likes to be an animator of the camp. He likes guiding the kids and planning games and activities. He doesn't mind working with the ten-year-olds, but he prefers working with the older ones, the ones around fourteen. That's probably mostly because of one particular boy, but Louis tries to ignore that. He tried to ignore the way his stomach flips when he sees the mop of curls bouncing up and down happily, he tries to ignore the way his heart starts speeding up when he looks into the shiny green eyes. He really tries to but he also knows he fails badly at that. He finds his crush really creepy and he tells himself he really needs to stop having weird crushes on people on this camp. Because honestly, first James who was a lot older than him and then Harry whom he doesn't even know well. He's only talked to Harry three times, but whenever Louis sees Harry, even if it's just for a second, he gets this overwhelming feeling and he's sure his crushes are getting creepier each year. It's Louis third day at the camp and it's dinner time. He has to sit with a different table each day, to mix with the kids a bit. It's not like he doesn't befriend the kids otherwise, but it's a principal rule of the camp. There's a light tap at his shoulder and when Louis turns around he is met by a smiling James. It's weird, but since Louis has met Harry, the not-crush-but-weird-feeling thing for James has gotten smaller.

"Can you sit with the oldest group today?" James asks and points at the table in the right corner.

"Sure," Louis nods and tries not to do a happy dance because that is Harry's table. He tries really hard not to smile too big and wow, he thinks, he really needs to make sure this crush does not get out of hand.

Holding his tray with dinner is his hand, he walks over to the table. As he approaches the table he catches Harry looking over at him, giving him a small wave and pointing at the empty seat next to him. Louis feels as if he is the luckiest person in the world. He's quite embarrassed with himself for feeling all those crushy feelings towards a two-years younger boy he has only known for two days but he can't really care. Harry is smiling at him and waving him over and the fact that Louis feels like a teenage girl does not matter. He has to remind himself that he's not one of the kids at this camp, he's one of the leaders. He can interact with the kids, become friends with them. But he cannot become friends with them in the way he would become friends with them if he wasn't an animator. He ignores that thought for now though and slips in the chair beside Harry.

"Hey," he smiles and greats the other kids too. He thinks it might become too weird if he - as one of the animators- only talks to one of the kids.

"Hi," Harry grins and then they start eating. The fourteen-year-olds giggle and talk and laugh, some including Louis in their conversations and some just laughing amongst themselves.

"What are we gonna do tomorrow, Louis?" A girl with very bright green eyes and wavy blonde hair asks.

"I don't really know yet," he admits. He's been thinking about it for a day now, but he thinks he might've ran out of things to do already. Usually the camp leaders have planned everything a while before the actual start of the camp, but since Louis only knew from the moment he arrived that he'd be doing this, he hasn't planned anything.

"How about we do something with music, like singing or I don't know," Harry suggests from his seat next to Louis and Louis' stomach makes that flip again. He sighs inwardly, he really needs to do something about this creepy crush. He thinks about Harry's idea for a while. Music, he's always liked music. In between his dream of wanting to be a footballer, he had this phase in which he wanted to become a singer. That phase had passed soon though, because he knew that was even more impossible than becoming a footballer. Still, whenever he sang, he got this feeling that he would not mind at all if it became his profession. He wasn't sure if he was good enough, though, so he never tried singing in front of people other than his friends and family. They always tell him he really has a voice, but Louis thinks they just say that because they love him and don't want to hurt him. Anyway, he thinks about following Harry's idea and maybe do something with music tomorrow. A bit of music can't hurt, can it?

"That's a good idea, Harry, I like it," Louis says with a way too fond smile he should really try to hide. "I'll do something musical tomorrow." Harry smiles back at him with shining eyes.

"Yay!" He exclaims happily and Louis has to grab his cutlery tightly to physically stop himself from reaching out to ruffle the brown curls. He really loves curly hair and Harry's curly hair is the most beautiful he's ever seen.

While the dinner continues and everybody picks up their conversations, Louis is trying really hard to stay a leader and not make his fond for Harry too obvious.

"You know, I really love to sing," Harry suddenly says quietly. It's loud enough for Louis to hear but he doubts anyone else has heard it, everyone is engaged in their own conversations and now he notices that it's only him and Harry who are not talking. Louis processes Harry's words and he can't stop himself from picturing Harry on a stage in front of a huge crowd, singing sappy love songs while the crowd goes crazy. He doesn't know why, but he knows Harry could do it. Harry could become a pop star. And not just "another pop star", he could really become an original, world famous pop star. He's never even heard Harry sing but he knows Harry can do it, he just knows. He finds it kind of creepy how strongly the feeling of knowing is pulling at him after he's reminded himself once again that no, he does not know Harry.

"Yeah?" Louis replies, softly because this conversation feels kind of private and Louis likes it.

"Yes. I was in a band at my old school. We were quite good, if I say so myself. I was the lead singer and if I'm honest, the days on which we had band practice were my favourite." Harry smiles at the memories and Louis wants to reach out and poke the dimples. He wants to reach out, poke the dimples, ruffle the curls and kiss the pink lips. He knows he's going crazy but it's not his fault. He can't help that the boy next to him is so stunning with his cheeky smile and his curly hair and his shiny eyes. But it's not just his looks it's _everything_. The way Harry talks, how he seems interested in everything anyone is saying and the fact that he would never hurt a fly. He looks so utterly adorable and amazing and Louis really, really wants to hug him. The way Harry talks about his old band  makes Louis smile even wider because the curly haired fourteen-year-old really seems to love singing.

"I'd love to hear something," Louis says. "I bet you can sing really well." He sees Harry blush faintly and he feels so proud that he is the reason the younger boy blushes.

"Maybe I can sing for you tomorrow," Harry says. His voice has gone even quieter and Louis has to do his best to understand the boy with the shiny eyes. His heart starts beating faster at Harry's words and he feels himself softening at the shy tone the words have.

"I'd like that," Louis replies and he does not feel like a part of the animator team anymore. For a moment he forgets he is supposed to behave older and more distant, he forgets he is not supposed to feel this crush feeling towards Harry. It doesn't matter to Louis anymore, he doesn't care that he's older than the curly haired boy and in a different position to Harry. It doesn't feel like that and he doesn't know why. Harry is different from the other people in this camp, different from anyone in the world, really. Harry is different and special and Louis likes it so much. Maybe even too much. He wonders if there is a rule book somewhere, with rules about camp leaders not being allowed to be in a relationship with one of the kids. He doesn't think so because it's not like this is a school or anything. Nobody would bother to make a rule like that, right? He decides that yes, nobody would bother so he doesn't have to worry. That's one less worry on his mind.

Harry smiles at him one more time and Louis nearly hisses because he really wants to touch those freaking dimples. Nevertheless, Louis smiles back. How could he not? He can't not smile when Harry smiles at him and he doesn't understand anyone who can. That person probably doesn't have any feelings, he thinks, maybe not even a heart.

The next day Louis sets up a music course. He's planned different things so everyone has something to enjoy. He doesn't really know if everyone's into music, but he remembers that every previous year there was at least one day evolving around music, so he guesses he's okay. It's ten forty-five and the kids are only to arrive around eleven so he's got some time left. He sits himself down behind the piano and lets his fingers hover above the keys. He's always liked playing the piano and when he was younger he's had lessons so he knows how to play some tunes. He presses down some keys which form the chord of what used to be his  favourite song when he was younger and he starts to play hesitatingly. It's been a while since he's touched a piano and he isn't quite sure if he's still capable of playing the song. After a few chords, the tune comes in and then he starts singing. He can't help it, it's something he's always done. Sing and play the piano. The words flood from his mouth easily and he's surprised he still knows all the lyrics. It's been so long since he's even listened to this song - let alone sing it. But he's still perfectly capable of singing it and something inside of him makes him feel quite proud of himself. Singing is like playing football, the little spark inside of him igniting and he just _needs_ to continue because doing all of this makes him so happy. The singing, playing the piano, it makes him feel like he's worth something, like he can do something with his life and like maybe there is a future for him. He sings so easily, it's as easy as breathing and he wishes he could do this continuously for the rest of his life without having to think about anything else. He is so caught up in the moment that he does not notice anything happening around him, of course he doesn't. So when he finishes the song and looks up it’s needless to say that he nearly has a heart attack as he sees Harry standing in the doorway, smiling at him with a huge grin, showing his dimples.

"Jesus, Harry, you scared me!" Louis exclaims and closes the lid of the piano.

"Sorry," Harry says but doesn't stop grinning. "I didn't want to say anything while you were singing because I'd ruin it."

Louis looks at Harry and he doesn't know what to say because every time he looks at Harry he's at a loss of words and he doesn't even mind. He does not mind that he looks stupid and ridiculous when Harry's around because he can't seem to care. He doesn't know what it is but he can't seem to care that he looks stupid because as long as Harry's there it's okay. Everything is alright as long as the boy with the curls and the shining green eyes is there. Louis knows his crush is getting out of hand, it's really becoming creepy and he should do something about it. But, again, he can't seem to care about that either. He has no idea what the boy is doing to him. He does know it's not healthy but he doesn't really mind.

"Your voice is really beautiful. Your singing was just flawless," Harry says admiringly and Louis feels the blush creeping up his cheeks.

"Thanks," he whispers and he sounds a lot more like a twelve-year-old girl than he wants.

"Is there anything you're not good at, I mean football and singing like a professional is not nothing, you know?" Harry asks and walks over to Louis who's still sitting at the piano, not really knowing what he should say. He's never considered himself a very good singer, just average. But Harry's words do something to him, they make him feel warm and fuzzy inside. Maybe he should see a doctor because this crush is really getting out of hand, he thinks before smiling and blushing at the boy with the curls.

"I'm not that good at singing, seriously. I could never do anything with it. I mean, I like singing. But I'm not good enough," Louis manages to explain. He can't really focus though because Harry's smile makes him dizzy.

"Oh come on, don't talk yourself down like that! You're amazing, you just don't see it," Harry says and leans against the piano. Louis wonders if Harry is ever going to stop smiling. He hopes he doesn't, though, because it would be a great loss.

"You've probably never heard a great singer then," Louis states and Harry barks a loud laugh which leads him to quickly cover his mouth in shame. Louis likes the laugh, though, he thinks it's cute. But he doesn't say it.

"I have, and I promise you that you're just as good as them," Harry smiles and Louis blushes because he does not know what to say and Harry makes his stomach do flip flops.

"What are you doing here so early anyway?" Louis asks when he remembers that he's an animator and Harry's a kid at the camp and that he's not supposed to be here earlier than his group.

"Dunno, I was wandering through the hallways and I heard you sing so I came to watch," Harry shrugs. Louis' stomach is really behaving strangely and he tries his best not to blush too hard but he knows it's not really working.

"Oh," Louis says because what else is he supposed to say? "Aren't you expected with the rest of the group somewhere?"

"Nah, we've got free time until eleven," Harry shrugs. He seems to suddenly realise something because his expression changes and he seems a lot less relaxed. "But...if you don't want me to be here already, I mean I understand, I'll go find my friends now. Uhm, I mean, sorry for just randomly walking in..." He seems uneasy and quite lost and somehow something in Louis changes and he is provided with words again.

"No, no, it's fine! Don't worry, Harry. I like your company. Besides, it's not long until eleven anyway, so there'd be no point in sending you away. Seriously, I don't mind you being here at all," Louis manages to say without feeling weird or stupid, he feels quite at ease to be honest.

"You sure?" Louis nods convincingly.

"Absolutely sure," he states and then Harry smiles again and Louis sighs inwardly of relief because honestly, everything is so much better when Harry smiles.

"D'you play any instrument, or just sing?" Louis asks while he moves over on the rather large piano seat to make some space for Harry. He pats the space invitingly and Harry sits down, smiling thankfully at Louis. Louis' stomach does the turning thing again, but luckily he doesn't use his capacity to speak this time.

"Nope, just sing," Harry says. He is sitting so close to Louis that Louis can feel Harry's body heat and can smell his scent and a few of Harry's curls tickle Louis' cheek. Louis concentrates hard on not suddenly reaching out and entwining his hands in Harry's curls because he really, really wants to do that.

"Will you sing for me?" Louis asks, his voice softer than he had planned on and his hearts starts to beat faster. He has never experienced a crush like this in his life and he doubts that it's healthy.

"Sure," Harry nods. "What'd you want me to sing?"

"I don't know, pick something you like."

"Alright, lemme think." Louis watches as Harry thinks and Louis really wants to reach out and take Harry's hand but he knows he can't.

"Got it," Harry says after a while of thinking and smiles at Louis. "Don't expect too much, though."

Louis nods but on the inside he knows he is allowed to expect much because he knows Harry is good at singing. And then Harry opens his mouth and words and a melody flood out and Louis is blown away. He has never heard anyone sing like this in his life and he doesn't think he ever will apart from Harry. Harry's voice is simply beautiful. Beautiful and quite deep for a fourteen-year-old, deep but not too deep and rough yet gentle. Louis doesn't know how to describe it. He can't because there are no words for what he's hearing. All he thinks is that this is the best moment of his life and if he didn't have a crush on Harry already he does now. He wants to capture this moment and stay in it forever. He wants to rest his head against the younger boy's shoulder and touch his curls and inhale his scent and be part of him because his voice gives him the most amazing feeling in the world. Louis thinks that maybe he wants to cry because he never thought he'd meet anyone as perfect as Harry. He didn't even think anyone like Harry existed. And now he's only known this boy for three days but he knows he'll get to know him more and more and maybe, just maybe, listening to his mum's orders to go to the summer camp against his will is the best decision he's ever made.

*_*_*_*_*

 

As time passes Louis gets to know Harry better and better and after two weeks they're the bests of friends. Maybe it's weird because Louis is a leader of the camp and Harry isn't. Maybe it's strange because Louis is sixteen and Harry fourteen. Maybe it's unusual because it's only been two weeks and they've already shared a lot with each other - even more than with their best friends at home. They've given each other nicknames and they talk like they've known each other for ages, completing each other sentences and knowing what's on the other's mind. Maybe it's weird, but somehow the two just fit. For Louis it feels as if something was missing for the past sixteen years of his life and now suddenly he found Harry and everything is complete. He doesn't know what it is but Harry is just perfect and Louis doesn't think he can go back to life without Harry. That's why he suppresses the thought of the camp ending in a week. He doesn't think about that, he doesn't talk about that. He talks about everything to Harry, except for that. He knows Harry thinks about it too. They both know they'll have to say goodbye soon. But they're both ignoring that for the moment and pretend to not notice that time has flown by.

Louis' crush on Harry has grown bigger - Louis didn't think it was possible but clearly it is - and whenever Louis is not near Harry time goes slower. He knows it's not normal but he can't help it. He blames the teenager hormones, but he also knows it's something else, something in his mind and his heart which keeps screaming HarryHarryHarry and all he can think is HarryHarryHarry. Harry laughing, Harry talking, Harry giggling and Harry barking a laugh and then covering his mouth quickly. HarryHarryHarry all day long, even when he's not around. And the worst part is, Louis doesn't mind. He doesn't care that Harry is occupying his mind 24/7, he doesn't mind that all he can think is Harry. Because he likes it, he enjoys it because Harry makes him happy.

Louis is really glad that Harry and Louis feel like they've already known each other for years because that means they've lost the idea of personal space. Seriously, there is no personal space between the two boys. Of course there is when Louis is supposed to be the leader of a group and treat all kids equally, but whenever Louis is at a table during breakfast, lunch or dinner - he's not moved table's since he sat at Harry's table for the first time and James does not seem to mind so Louis keeps sitting there - Louis' body is always turned towards Harry and him and Harry are always engaged in a conversation. It's not like they don't include other people in their conversations, or that they don't pay attention to anyone else, it's just that they are more interested in each other than in other people. And both of them don't mind and it does not look like anyone else cares. They do receive some looks now and then, but most people on the camp already got used to the two boys acting like they are best friends. In fact, they are best friends. People don't look up strangely when Louis' hand is on Harry's arm or when Louis' hands are buried in Harry's curls. No weird looks are given when Harry brushes Louis' hair out of his eyes or when Harry curls into Louis' lap in the evening when everyone's sitting around talking or watching tv. It was strange in the first week, but now everyone is used to it. Louis is not though. His heart still skips a beat whenever Harry comes close to him and his stomach still twirls and flips in various ways. And whenever Harry touches him there's a warmth spreading through Louis' body of which he's sure he has never felt before and he will never get enough of. Louis' desire to kiss Harry is growing stronger everyday but he tries his hardest to resist. He doesn't know how Harry will react if he kisses him and he doesn't need to complicate things because things are nice and easy now.

It's Monday of the last week when Harry falls ill. It's quite suddenly, actually. It's Louis' time with the fourteen-to-fifteen-year-olds and they're in the forest which lays behind the camp. They're in the forest and they're taking this walk with a special guide who tells the kids - and Louis and another one of the animators - a lot about the animals and nature and it's all very interesting. Harry's walking next to Louis, who is doing his best to resist the urge to take the younger boy's hand.

"Hey, Haz," Louis says when the guide is silent for a while and everyone is talking. "You've been so quiet today, anything up?"

"I don't feel so well," Harry says softly and now Louis thinks about it, Harry does look paler and weaker.

"What's wrong?" Louis asks and places a hand on Harry's shoulder.

"Headache," Harry says. "And I feel sick. Also I think I might have a bit of a temperature."

"What? Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Louis says before he realises he sounds like a worried boyfriend. Harry doesn't seem to notice that, though and shrugs lightly.

"Because I didn't want to worry you I guess," he says. Louis heart warms at those words because it means Harry really cares for him. And honestly, now Louis isn't the only one sounding like a boyfriend.

"That's really sweet of you, Curly. But next time just tell me, it's better for you. Now, let me check if you have a temperature," Louis says and slides his hand carefully in Harry's neck.

"Jesus, Haz! You're hot!" He exclaims and pulls his hand away.

"I've always been," Harry winks cheekily and Louis shouldn't have to giggle at that but he does.

"I know, but that's not what I mean right now," he says after a few seconds of laughing. "This is serious and we need to get you to the campus now."

"I can hold on a little longer," Harry protests.  "I don't want everything to go different than planned because of me."  
Louis sighs, sometimes he hates the fact that Harry is so selfless and cares so much for other people because it makes everything so much more difficult.

"You're _sick_ , Harry. Nobody will blame you if things go differently. Besides,  things don't have to go differently for other people if I just take you back to the camp, alright?"

"Alright," Harry says but he suddenly seems paler than before and he grabs Louis' arm.

"What's wrong?" Louis asks before Harry lets go off him and starts to walk to the side of the path in the forest.

"I think I'm gonna throw up," Harry whispers then and Louis rushes over to him, placing his hand on the boy's back and brushing it soothingly. Then Harry doubles over and throws up and there's nothing Louis can do. He sees his favourite person in the world throwing up the contents of his stomach in pain and there's nothing Louis can do. He rubs Harry's back and makes sure the curls of the boy are not hanging in his face while Harry makes gagging noises and throws up. The other kids from the group have decided to go stand a bit further away and Louis can't blame them - he'd do the same if this wasn't Harry. The other animator walks over to the two of them and says that it's probably better if Louis takes Harry back to the camp. Louis agrees and then the other leader walks back to the group of kids because he clearly can't really handle somebody throwing up.

Harry stands up straight again and Louis sees tear tracks on his cheek.

"You think that was it? I mean, d'you think you're ready to go back now?" Louis asks gently and keeps his hand on Harry's back. Harry nods and smiles weakly.

"Sorry about that," he says softly but Louis shakes his head.

"Nothing to be sorry for, you're sick, that's not your fault. Come on." Harry let's himself be guided by Louis when they walk back out of the forest. Not much is said between the two boys because Harry feels like shit of course. Louis doesn't let go of Harry's back because it seems to relax Harry a bit.

"Thanks, Lou," Harry whispers when they're at the door of the building.

"Anything for you," Louis smiles before he realises what he's said. He feels his cheeks turning red and he busies himself with opening the door. After he's let Harry in, he guides him to Harry's dorm.

"Let's go brush your teeth and clean you up a bit, alright? We'll go see the nurse then," Louis says, still not releasing his hand from Harry's back. It feels so good there, like it belongs there and he really doesn't want to take it off. Harry doesn't seem to mind.

They enter Harry's dorm room and the sick boy goes over to his suitcase to grab his toothbrush.

"Take some comfortable clothes like your pyjama's too," Louis suggests and Harry nods in agreement, sending Louis a weak smile. Louis knows the smile is genuine and Harry's just not feeling well, but it still hurts him that he doesn't get a full-on dimple smile. He takes the clothes from Harry to hold them while he's busy cleaning his teeth.

"Come with me, please. I'm scared I'll fall or whatever," Harry says softly.

"Yeah, of course," Louis replies and walks with Harry to the bathroom. He watches how Harry brushes his teeth and he feels sort of a creep, analysing every little movement Harry makes. He notices how Harry first flushes his mouth a few times before beginning to brush his teeth. The way he brushes his teeth is just like the way other people brush their teeth, but Louis still manages to pick out some little things that make Harry different. The way Harry holds his toothbrush for example, his pinkie finger sticking out as if he's trying to drink tea the polite way. It's all so cute, Louis really has to do his best not to hug Harry all of a sudden.

When Harry finishes brushing his teeth, Louis hands him the comfortable clothes and he wants to exit the bathroom but he's not sure if he should. Harry hasn't told him to do so and he doesn't know if the request from earlier on also counts for now. Harry doesn't seem to think about it though because he throws off his T-shirt and grabs the new, baggier one.

"C-cold," Harry manages to say but his cheeks look like he's burning up and Louis wants to hold him in his arms so badly that it might actually hurt him if he keeps wishing for it.

"Put on the shirt, Haz, it'll keep you warm," Louis tries to say this with his eyes focused on Harry's face but he fails miserably. He can't help and throw a glance at the younger boy's body. Louis wants to know what it would feel like if he could only just lay his hands on Harry's bare shoulders and he shivers slightly at the thought. Before he can think too much and get too distracted, Harry puts on the baggy T-shirt. Louis has to force himself not to sigh at the sight, he knew Harry looked good in loose shirts and he knew Harry also looked great in tight shirts, but Harry in a _baggy_ shirt make Louis' knees go week. Harry starts unbuckling his belt and Louis swallows, it's making him a bit too uncomfortable. Louis keeps on watching Harry anyway because he simply can't look away. He doesn't know which is more obvious, watching Harry take his trousers off or looking away. Harry doesn't seem to mind though, he knows Harry undresses quite often around friends and he knows Harry doesn't make a problem out of it. Harry takes off his trousers and Louis stares at a point behind Harry's head determinedly because no, he can't watch Harry in his boxers. Harry puts on his sweatpants then and Louis lets out a breath he doesn't know he's been holding in.

"I feel so awful, Lou," Harry says with a tiny voice and Louis puts his hand on Harry's arm. He wishes he could just hug Harry and he knows he can, he is almost certain Harry wouldn't mind at all, but he feels like right now everything is more intimate, more private.

"It's gonna be better, you're gonna feel better again soon. We'll go see the nurse now, alright?"

Harry nods and Louis puts his hand back on Harry's back as they walk to the nurse because it seems to calm Harry a bit.

They arrive at the nurse and she takes Harry's temperature. She gives Harry some medicine and says that Harry needs to rest. If he wants he can go home, but Harry assures her and Louis that for now he's fine being here. There's something in his voice that gives Louis the feeling that Harry wants to stay here because Louis is here; but maybe it's Louis' mind playing tricks on him.

Louis walks Harry back to the dorm room.

"Go lay down, Haz. I'll bring you some water and then just try to sleep," Louis says and Harry nods. He climbs into bed as Louis goes to the bathroom and fills a glass with water.

"Here you go," he says and hands Harry the glass. Harry drinks it quickly and then sits up in his bed.

"Thank you, Lou," he says softly, "for taking care of me." He sends Louis a smile that makes Louis' heart beat a little faster.

"It's what camp leaders do," Louis says and takes a seat on the side of Harry's bed.

"But you do it as a friend, right?" Harry asks as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. Louis wants to reply that yes of course he does, but he also wants to let Harry know that Harry is so much more than a friend. He wants to let Harry know that his curls are the most beautiful Louis has ever seen and that his eyes make Louis' stomach twirl and that his voice, _oh god his voice,_ is the voice of an angle. He doesn't though, when he opens his mouth something different comes out.

"Not just a friend, though." And at first Louis is shocked by it and he wants the ground to swallow him whole, he wants to be taken away right here and now and be erased from existence because who says that? Who on earth opens his mouth and says that?

He sees that Harry smiles though, Harry smiles and even blushes and his dimples show.

"I like you." The three words come out Harry's mouth so simply, so natural and maybe that is because between Harry and Louis it is natural and it is supposed to be, it is meant to be. And maybe it's because it's just the thing they think about day and night said out loud, but it still feels so surreal to Louis that he can't think of what to say. He feels the words hanging in the air but it is not the heavy kind of hanging in air, it was the kind of just stating a fact hanging in the air. Just pointing out the obvious. Louis doesn't know what to say because _i like you too_ seems so stupid. A curl falls on Harry's forehead and Louis brushes it away, without even thinking about it. It's just another thing that makes everything between them so natural and he wants to melt into the feeling of _i like you_. It's just three words but they have so much meaning to Louis that he wants to cry and laugh and dance on the top of a rainbow at the same time and he can see in Harry's eyes that Harry feels the same. And then the moment just feels right. It feels like ten million voices are suddenly shouting ‘what are you waiting for!’ Ten million voices are saying that _this is LouisandHarry's moment_ and that there is really nothing else Louis or Harry can do in this moment. Louis is still a bit scared of what might happen, of how Harry will react because what if everything goes so differently from what Louis thinks will happen? Louis has always been scared of changes but right now he wants the situation between Harry and him to change and he knows that right now is the moment. He once read somewhere that all someone needs to change their life is twenty seconds of blind courage. Twenty seconds of no fair whatsoever and it could change everything forever. So this is what Louis does, he decides that his twenty seconds are right now and he leans in and touches his lips to Harry's. And as soon as Harry's lips touch his and the sparkle between them explodes to a firework Louis knows that he was right and these were his twenty second and that he couldn't have taken a better decision. He feels Harry smile into the kiss and he realises he does the same and he wants this moment to never end. The kiss is far from a perfect kiss because they are not sitting in the most easy position and Harry is still sick and Louis has to admit that he himself is not a skilled kisser but he doesn't care because for Harryandhim it is the most perfect kiss they could wish for.

When they break apart after what feels like less than a second but is probably a bit longer, Louis feels his heartbeat has increased by so much he is surprised he is still breathing. Harry smiles at him with a foolish grin and Louis is sure he is looking exactly the same. The foolish grin on Harry's pale face with the red cheeks looks so adorable Louis can't stop himself from briefly pecking Harry's lips again. They look at each other for several seconds and then both giggle softly. Louis thinks if there's something he needs to say right now but he can't really come up with something because everything is already said or doesn't need to be said out loud.

"I would love to continue this," Harry says, his voice quiet and shaky but happiness hidden underneath, "but I'm so tired and I don't feel very well and I think it's best if I go to sleep."

Louis smiles at the boy with the beautiful curls, who's face is now only a few inches away. "I think that's best too." And it is okay to say that because Louis knows, he feels, that Harry feels the same way about him and that everything between them is right and that if Harry wasn't this sick they would definitely continue. So Louis nods and wraps his arms around the boy with the dimpled smile and kisses his hair and whispers "goodnight" in his ear. He feels Harry smile against him and when Harry turns his face around and kisses Louis on the lips with a smile Louis has to make sure he doesn't faint. He knows Harry is the one who's ill but right now Louis feels like maybe he himself is too. He smiles back at Harry and Harry lays down in the bed. Louis makes sure Harry is nicely tugged in, but he doesn't want to go away after that. The moment is so special and Louis doesn't want it to end because he loves the way Harry makes him feel. Harry seems to read his mind because he takes Louis' hand and starts playing with his fingers.

"Stay with me? Until I fall asleep?" Harry asks and looks up at Louis with his beautiful green eyes which don't shine so brightly right now because he's ill but are still the most beautiful eyes in the world. Louis nods and smiles.

"Of course," he says because honestly, how could anyone in the world say no to that?

Harry smiles tiredly at Louis in response and shifts a bit to the left side of the bed so that Louis can lie down next to him. They don't say anything as Louis lies down and curls up next to Harry. Louis asks himself how it is possible that everything between Harry and him feels so natural. He wonders why he isn't super nervous and scared. Of course he has the heart beating and he feels more warm than normal, but he thinks more of it as being in love and not as being scared. In a way the increased heart beating and the strange movements his stomach makes are nice because isn't it wonderful how just one boy can make Louis feel?

Harry shifts again and cuddles up next to Louis, who wraps his arms around the younger boy as if it is a routine they go through every night. Louis hopes it will become a routine, because a curled up Harry sharing his warmth with Louis is the most amazing feeling in the world - apart from kissing Harry of course.

"Goodnight, Lou," Harry whispers with a soft voice and Louis presses a kiss to the ill boy's forehead.

"Goodnight curly," he whispers back and he isn't even planning on leaving after Harry falls asleep. He isn't even planning on ever leaving

  
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

 

Louis wakes up a few hours later because some curls are tickling his nose. He smiles, realising that the warmth he feels against him is Harry. Harry, cute, cuddly, beautiful, funny, amazing Harry is lying in his arms. The boy with the curls is still asleep and Louis can see that his temperature has gone down, he doesn't have a fever anymore. Louis looks at the beautiful sleeping boy for a while and studies his features. His lips are open a tiny bit, making Louis want to kiss them. He can't believe he actually has and he can't believe that Harry wouldn't mind if Louis kissed him again. He stares at Harry's lips and then moves his eyes to Harry's eyes and looks at his laches. They are so beautiful and somehow they look soft and Louis wants to touch them but he also realises that that would be kind of weird. There's a knock at the door and before Louis can respond or roll out of bed or pretend that he absolutely wasn't lying in the same bed as Harry, James walks into the room. Louis doesn't even have time to turn around and unwrap his arms from around Harry's torso so there is no way James can think Louis and Harry are just friends. James stops in the door opening and eyes Louis and Harry. He sees that Louis is awake and sends Louis a meaningful look, his eyebrows raised high. He smirks with it though, so Louis knows he doesn't mind. Louis smiles back, because he doesn't know what else to do. It's weird, a few years ago Louis dreamed of him and James lying like this and now he was James and Harry was him and it was more perfect than he could've imagined. James walks towards Louis and looks at him a second before talking.

"How's he? I heard he got sick in the forest," James whispered softly not to wake Harry.

"Yeah, he hadn't felt okay the whole day but didn't want to worry anyone," Louis whispered back, lifting his head a bit to look over the mop of curls. "He's a bit better now. Doesn't have a temperature anymore."

James nods.

"He's such a sweet boy, of course he didn't want to worry anyone. Anyway, maybe you should wake him for dinner because he has to eat something, alright?"

"Yeah I will," Louis nods and then a curl tickles his nose and he giggles softly. James laughs and shakes his head, looking at Louis as if he is his younger brother.

"You guys are the cutest. I think you should be very happy you came to camp this summer," James winks and Louis grins widely. James is right, Louis is more than happy that he came to camp this year because he wouldn't have wanted to miss it for anything.

"I am," Louis smiles.

"I have to go back now, but make sure you keep it PG rated around other people okay?" James jokes and Louis laughs and James laughs back and then they say bye and James walks out of the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

Louis hugs Harry a little closer and presses a kiss in the boy's neck.

"Wake up Haz," he whispers. "You gotta have some dinner." He kisses Harry in his neck a few more times, not because he thinks it will wake Harry up but because he likes doing it. He likes to feel his lips against Harry's soft warm skin and he's sure he can do it forever if he has to. Harry stirs a bit and moans softly, then brings up his hand to his eyes and presses his hands against them. As he opens them, he catches Louis watching and he smiles sleepily at the older boy.

"Hello," Louis says and is not able to wipe the smile of his face because Harry gives him butterflies.

"Hiiii," Harry says and stirs a bit more so that he is facing Louis. He moves in a little bit closer and presses his lips against Louis’. Louis feels amazing because he does not have to ask for the kiss or make the first move, the first thing Harry does when he wakes up is kiss Louis. Louis feels like he is flying and dancing at the same time because this feeling is amazing. He kisses Harry back and when they pull apart they smile at each other. Harry smiles this cute smile with the dimples and Louis is convinced he'll melt any second because how can Harry be that goddamn cute but handsome at the same time?

"How are you feeling?" Louis asks.

"I'm alright," Harry says, feeling for Louis' hand under the covers and waving their fingers together. "Still got a slight headache and my throat hurts, but my stomach feels a lot better than this morning."

"Glad to hear that," Louis smiles and kisses Harry's forehead. "So you'll have some dinner, right?"

"Yeah I think I will." Louis starts to get out of bed but Harry stops him.

"Thanks, Lou."

"For what?"

"For staying with me, and for not changing your mind when you woke up." Louis smiles and wants to cry at the same time because what Harry says is so beautiful and Louis has never heard someone say something like that to him.

"No; thank _you_ ," Louis replies and kisses Harry again, just because he can and maybe because he really loves the feeling.

Louis doesn't like how quickly time is passing and how quickly the camp is coming to an end. He knows Harry doesn't live too far away and they can always meet up and he knows they will do just that, but nevertheless he is scared. He is scared something will happen or someone else might come along or basically he is just scared that everything will change. He doesn't want to be scared, he doesn't want to be worried and he doesn't want this damn week to end. Harry gets better and after two days of resting and Louis taking care of him - which is just basically a lot of cuddling and snuggling and some kisses here and there and some falling asleep three times a day. But Harry gets better and he participates in group activities. In a way Louis doesn't like that Harry got better because he loved taking care of him and spending so much time with him. Now Louis has to supervise different groups all day long, only seeing Harry a few hours. But it's better than not seeing him and Louis cherishes the moments he has with Harry.

The first night Harry is better Harry asks Louis if he can't secretly sneak into his room and cuddle with him until they both fall asleep. Louis laughs at that and pokes Harry's nose. He says he wishes he could but that the other guys in Harry's room would probably not like it very much. Harry laughs at that and wraps his arms around Louis then, burying his face in Louis chest and breathing in his scent.

"You're so cute," Louis whispers as he wraps his arms around the curly boy in response and brushes his back softly.

"You are a lot cuter," Harry says and Louis feels him smile against his chest and he thinks that this is what happiness might feel like.

Louis and Harry are in the corner of the big sitting room where everyone always gathers in the evening before official bedtimes. They haven't told anyone about them yet because they figured that everyone already knew or would find out anyway, and exactly that happens. Most people don't even see there is a difference and when Louis was taking care of a sick Harry for three days nobody thought it was strange. It was during those days that Lottie came to Louis and asked him if him and Harry were officially together. Louis just smiled and nodded and she said "you guys are cute" and then left.

He can spot her smiling at him now from where she's sitting on the couch next to her new friends. She gives him a tiny wave when he looks up over Harry's curls and he smiles back at her.

"I'm gonna miss you so much, Lou," Harry says, his face still against Louis' chest. Louis stiffens for a second because this is the first time Harry says anything about the fact that they are going to be separated in less than three days. Louis hasn't brought the subject up either because he doesn't want to think about it, but he knows there's no point in denying, it will happen anyway.

"I'm gonna miss you so much too," Louis says, a slight lump forming in his throat. He hugs Harry a little bit closer and holds him tighter because it's Harry and he needs to know that Louis means everything he says.

"I don't know what I'm gonna do without you, I might die," Harry says seriously as he lifts his head and looks up at Louis. Louis smiles at Harry automatically because Harry is the reason for Louis' smile and he cannot stop it. Even if he wanted to.

"You won't die, Silly. You'll survive. We'll keep contact of course and meet up whenever we can, right?"

"Yeah but it's not enough," Harry says, pouting a little. Louis manages to laugh a little bit, as if Harry is joking. But he know it's only partly because no, it's not enough.

"We'll have to deal with it and make the best of the last days," Louis says to try to silence Harry's thoughts. He knows he has to reassure Harry because Harry is the younger one but Louis knows that he doesn't want this week to end just as much as Harry doesn't want it.

"Yes, and not think about the future," Harry nods and Louis hugs him tighter again in response.

"Lou," Harry says a moment later. "Do you think I can sneak out at night, and you too? I want to set up a sort of date, because I have always wanted to go on some sort of date and you are like the perfect person for that."

Louis feels like his heart is going to bounce out of his chest. He can't believe how cute Harry is, he can't believe Harry is a real human being. For a second he is scared he made Harry up somehow and all of this is imaginary, but then he remembers that others can see Harry and that Harry is very real. He can't believe how deeply in love he is with the boy with the curls, he can't believe how the green eyes can make his knees go weak and his heart beat faster. He can't believe how much this boy he only met less than three weeks ago means to him. In a way it scares him, but he also knows that Harry would never hurt him.

"Of course I want to, and of course I can sneak out the both of us - I'm an animator," Louis says and kisses Harry's forehead softly.

Things go as planned and that night Louis tells the other animators that he is going to take a walk outside because he can't sleep. He has agreed with Harry on a time and Harry is standing outside his dorm room just at the right moment. Louis smiles at him as he sees the boy with the curls, his green eyes lighting up in the dim light in the hallway. Harry smiles back at Louis. They whisper a soft greeting and everything feels like a scene out of a movie, as sneaky and exciting as it is. They walk outside together, their hands locked together strongly, like nothing could ever tear them apart. And that's maybe very true, Louis thinks.

As they walk outside to an open space before the forest begins, Louis sees that Harry is carrying a backpack.

"You didn't tell me I had to bring something?" Louis questions, motioning over to the backpack. Harry smiles at him and squeezes his hand.

"Of course I didn't, I'm setting up this date. You can do the next one, and bring all the stuff. This one is on me," Harry smiles and Louis still cannot believe that this beautiful boy actually likes him. He can't believe that this boy wants to spend time with him, sneak out together at night, do something against the rules of the camp.

When they reach the open space, Harry sets down his backpack and opens it, taking out a folded blanket. He unfolds it and gestures for Louis to sit down on it. Louis does as he is told, not being able to resist the grin on his face. Harry seems to feel the same way, his dimples visible. Louis reaches out and pokes at one as Harry sits down next to him. Harry laughs at that and turns to Louis so he can kiss him. They kiss for a short while, and Louis still cannot believe how amazing it is that he gets to kiss Harry. He gets to kiss him and hold him in his arms. He gets to brush his cheek and tangle his hands in the curls. He gets to do all that and he gets to make Harry happy, while Harry makes him happy. He can't seem to think of a more perfect situation - except maybe if this wasn't a summer camp and it wouldn’t all end soon, but he tries to push that thought away.

"Okay, I brought something and I thought you might like it," Harry says and reaches for his backpack. But then a thought seems to strike him and he throws a look at Louis. He then chews his bottom lip as he busies himself with his backpack.

"Hey, what's up, all of a sudden?" Louis asks worriedly and Harry shrugs, but he turns to look at him.

"I...i just. I only now realised that maybe you won't like it at all. Maybe you'll think it's childish and stupid and you might regret sneaking out with me because you're going to have the most awful night of your life," Harry blurs out, avoiding Louis' eyes. Louis can't help but feel something strong for this boy, this impulse to keep him in his arms and protect him from whatever might bother him. He wants Harry to feel nothing but happiness and he cannot imagine that Harry would do anything that Louis does not find amazing. So Louis does as his instinct tells him, he reaches out for Harry and pulls him against him, holding him tightly and pressing kisses in his hair.

"Hey, look; there's nothing you could do or say to change my feelings for you. And don't worry about being childish, I think out of the two of us, I am the most childish person." Harry chuckles at that and turns around so he faces Louis.

"Yeah but I'm still the youngest. You might get bored of me soon, I mean I am two years younger!"

"So what?" Louis says and buries his face in Harry's curls. "I don't feel any difference. You're Harry and that's all that matters." Louis hasn't even thought about the age thing, if he's honest. He doesn't care that he's two years older, he doesn't even feel that.

Harry smiles at him and seems to accept the fact.

"Yeah, I don't really notice either," he smiles and he pecks Louis' lips. "Okay, I'll just get on with it but be honest please, tell me if you absolutely hate it." Louis knows that he won't, no matter what. He cannot think of anything Harry would plan that Louis wouldn't like, so he just nods.

"Okay; so I thought," Harry starts and takes something out of his backpack, a stack of papers. "That maybe, since we both really like singing, we could sing something together?" Louis' heart swells at the words and his stomach is doing strange things again. How on earth did Louis get to meet a perfect boy like this? How on earth did he get so lucky to spend three full weeks with him on summer camp? Louis is at a loss of words and he doesn't think he'll ever find them again.

"I...Harry that's...I absolutely love it." He is so stunned and he just stares at Harry for a while. Harry seems to get that Louis really does love the idea so he hands him a paper.

"I wasn't sure if we both knew the same songs by heart so, yeah. I chose a few and I took the lyrics with me. We can choose." Louis looks at the paper and his heart nearly skips a beat when he sees the first song. Harry knows him too well.

"You really listened to what I played at the piano two weeks ago, didn't you?" Louis smiles and Harry blushes.

"I might've liked you from the second I first saw you?" Harry admits quietly and Louis grins. He can't believe that Harry had felt the exact same from the beginning.

"I might've liked you too from the exact same moment," Louis smiles back and Harry blushes again and smiles at him.

Then they start singing the song Louis had played on the piano, and Louis can't help but notice how beautiful their voices harmonise.

They sing the song through, locking eyes and smiling at each other, Harry sometimes needs to look at the lyrics but that doesn't bother Louis at all. The moment is magical, as if taken straight out of a fairy tale. Louis feels so amazing he wants to cry but he thinks that that might ruin the whole magical moment so he doesn't, he just smiles and lets the tears of happiness sit safe behind his eyes. Halfway through the song Harry catches Louis' hand in his and they play with each other's fingers throughout the song. Louis loves this and he doesn't think he's ever felt so amazing before. He's never had a moment like this before in his life and he doesn't want it to end. He wants to freeze time right here and keep it frozen forever, sitting in the dark next to Harry on a blanket, their fingers entwined and the two boys turning their feelings into words by singing. It feels perfect and magical. And once again, but stronger than ever before, Louis realises how much Harry means to him. He realises how much his life has changed since he met the boy with the curls and the beautiful green eyes. He realises how much he feels for Harry. He realises how much he could not live without Harry. He realises how much he loves this boy, simply said. It might be scary or weird to think because he is only sixteen, he is only a boy and probably does not know what true love is. But that doesn't matter, because right now this is what true love feels like. He doesn't care if in ten years from now he'll look back and laugh at himself. Because right now it feels right and right now is what counts.

" _And I'll look after you_ ," they finish the song together, slowly fading out.

They look at each other and Louis smiles, feeling happy but sad at the same time because he knows everything will change once summer camp is over.

"I don't want it to be over, Lou," Harry says sadly and cuddles up closer to Louis. Louis holds the fourteen-year-old in his arms and sighs.

"Me neither, I absolutely don't want it to be over. But we'll make it alright, we'll meet up more often than not, okay? You'll see me so often you'll get sick of me," Louis tries to reassure Harry, and plants a few kisses on the boy's head.

Harry stays quiet for a moment and then really softly, comes a whisper.

"What if you forget about me? I don't want you to forget about me."

It is so soft Louis nearly doesn't catch it at first, but when he does his heart clinches.

"No," he says soft but firmly. "Harry I simply cannot forget you."

"But why not? You're older and have a whole different life and maybe I'm just this weird summer crush for you that you will forget about as soon as school starts," Harry says hopelessly and Louis feels the desperate need to reassure Harry and make him feel safe and special because he _is_. He is the most amazing boy Louis has ever met and he simply cannot forget him. Not even if he tried his best.

"First of all, summer _love_ , not summer _crush_. You're so much more than a simple crush, Haz. And you can leave the summer out because you are not some summer fling, you are going to stick around much, much longer than a summer. You are the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me and I am not going to forget that. Never. It might get a little bit hard to speak to each other every day, but we can do it, we can keep it up. And we're going to be together because I know that I simply cannot live without you. It's as easy as that. Before I met you it felt like something was missing, and now that I've found the missing piece I am never going to let it go, Harry. But said all much simply and shorter than that: I love you. And that is why I'm never going to forget you. I love you, much more than I have ever loved anyone else. So don't think that I'll forget you, please, you are the one person I am going to remember forever. Because I love you." When Louis is done talking he realises that this has been something he had wanted to tell Harry for a while but he didn't really know how. And now it just came out of his mouth like it was nothing. But he loves Harry and he needs Harry to know that. He needs Harry to understand. That distance or age or anything isn't going to change whatever it is they have between them. They are each other missing puzzle piece. Harry looks at Louis with wide, stunned eyes. But a smile and a blush and eyes that say that he knows Louis means it. He swallows thickly and kisses Louis, long and tender and sweetly.

"I love you too, Louis. So, so, so much. And I will never forget you either."

The two boys sit like that for the rest of the night, talking and kissing and cuddling and crying and singing. They fall asleep a few hours before dawn and wake up early in the morning, so that they can sneak back into the building before their last day of summer camp together starts.

Louis doesn't have Harry's group that day, but in the evening before everyone has to be picked up by their parents there's a barbeque and Louis and Harry are sitting together at a table, feet tangled together. They talk and laugh, both with a sad edge because they know it's going to end soon.

Louis tells a joke and Harry barks a laugh at it, he then covers his mouth because he is embarrassed and then smiles a wide smile at Louis, dimples showing. Louis pokes the dimples just because he can, and smiles back at the boy with the bouncy curls, clear green eyes, pink, soft lips and an angelic voice. And in that moment he knows, that this is one of those moments that will stay froze in his head as a picture in a frame. He knows that he will never forget Harry, or never let this boy go, because he loves him. So, so much.

For a moment he smiles because a thought occurs to him, his mum was right, once again, she was right that he was going to have an amazing time at the summer camp.

And then he smiles because it's _Harry_ that is in front of him and you simply cannot not smile when Harry smiles at you like that. He takes Harry in once more, from head to toe. The smile, the curls, the eyes, the long limbs from which you know will look amazing when he is older and the way everything about Harry is so amazingly beautiful, more beautiful than anyone in the world. And then Louis curses himself in his head. _Fuck_ , he thinks, this boy is going to be the death of me. But he doesn’t really care, because he feels more alive, happier and more amazing than ever before, and he is so, so glad he went to this camp one last time.

**Author's Note:**

> Any commentry is very welcome and appreciated :)
> 
> Also, I'm thinking about writing a sequal to this  
> My tumblr: eversincefiveboys.tumblr.com


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